Sleeping is an art form.Practice makes perfect and I have trained myself to sleep like a log.The different skills that I have gathered while mastering this skill is beyond exemplary.

(INSPIRATION for this post: my lil sis who is supposedly studying but sleeping with her book open right now.)

  1. Sleep talking: Yes, I do this. I talk aloud what I say to people in my dreams. I cry, I wail and I shout for my mommy like a little girl in my sleep. Whenever I miss her, I cry for her in my sleep.I scold my annoying sister when asleep for all the annoying pranks she pulls on me in my dreams. I pray in my sleep. I ramble out definitions and formulas and speak some strange language according to listeners. I was on the bus, headimg back home , it was a 14 hour journey, i fell asleep to wake up at midnight shouting “Amachi” loudly. (That’s what I call my grandmother). Apparently,sleep talking is the less hazardous skill I have harnessed and with that let’s move on to the most dangerous of them all, ‘sleeping like a log’
  2. Sleeping like a log : aka sleeping like the dead. I am not the only one that has this set of skills, in fact my entire family shares this set of skills. We once slept through an earthquake and had no idea of what happened the night before. The next morning when the watch man informed us of what had trespassed the night before, we were shocked. Apparently all the inmates in all the ten floors had felt the tremors and ran off to safety save one family. I once fell asleep on the bus, a deep sleep it was and walk up an hour later and had no idea where I was or why I was on the bus for a few minutes. I kind of travelled with only just the bus fare, which is very very stupid. If I had missed my stop, I could have got down only at some far away stop which might have been atleast an hour away.I might have got stranded there with no money to get back home and the juice in my phone running out.
  3. Sleeping positions:  You  might already be familiar ,like any layman, with sleeping on ur back,on your stomach and your sides.  I however, can sleep standing. Yes, you read right, standing. It was at a youth camp, we had to wake up at an unearthly hour and go about till 11 at night and then we stayed up late talkin into the night. Two days later, it was night and i was at the worship section,standing ,closing my eyes devotedly in prayer and dozing off. I was seeing a road and cars and then i open my eyes and see the band playing. T’was a rough night.Anyway, that was the night when my skill went up a level high. Since then, i frequently sleep on the buses while standing. Someone should knock some sense into me.
  4. Sleeping anywhere,everywhere: On the bus, in the bed, on a chair, standing , sitting and lying down, at home , at school , during seminars, conferences and symposia, learning quantum mechanics, drowsing and dozing off to every damn lecture, I can sleep anywhere, everywhere no matter what strange time it is.
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